Ode To A Keyring, by The Laughing Guardia
(Transcribed by Michele)

All day I walk these corridors
Of white and peeling stone
This job has really opened doors:
It almost feels like home.

For quite some time `twas no-one here,
No-one to lock away;
Well, only Senor Kennedy --
Enough to earn my pay.

Then Senor H and all his crew
Sailed right into our fleet;
Oh boy! I've got more work to do --
My life is now complete!

I use my keys all shiny bright
To open up their cell
The Duchess says it stinks she's right
But I've lost my sense of smell.

Each afternoon at five bells' ring
They'd go out for their stroll;
Then off I go delivering
Brown soup and mouldy roll.

Then one day off Ingleses run
Spoke awful Espanol;
My boss got really pi$$ed and dumped
Hornblower in the hole.

But then they went to save our men --
They first gave their parole;
So now they've come back home again
To sunny El Ferrol.

And so once more I ope' the door
For prodigals come home;
I laugh and use my keys once more
For Jamie and for Io'n.

O key ring made of rusty brass
With keys both great and plain,
You've made a happy man at last:
The Laughing Guard of Spain.